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9.13.2013

turning point

The beginning of our relationship has been rocky to say the least.
For the first eight days rejection was the norm.  Sure, occasionally I'd get a resigned, "Oh, I'm going to have to let her hold me, but I'm going to try to bite her first." For the most part, me offering my hand was ignored... 

getting dissed...again
And then Tuesday night, one week and one day after I met my youngest daughter, there was a turning point.  We had spent the afternoon and evening visiting New Day South (and I will be writing about that time later) and when we climbed into the van to head back to the Garden, Little Bit decided that only I would do.  And not just did she want to sit beside me, but she wanted to sit on my lap and snuggle in.  For nearly an hour of our ride she nestled her head against me and allowed me to rub her back and arms.  After a week of being pushed away, it was pure heaven.

The moments of allowing me into her heart have continued over the past several days.  Wednesday night she pitched a fit that attracted the attention of the entire China Southern flight because she wanted to sit with Mama instead of Baba.  And while we visited the Great Wall yesterday I was the only one that would do when she was unsure of her footing on the stairs.  (Um.  Wow.  You haven't gotten a workout until you've carried a 40 pounder up the uneven steps of the wall at Mutianyu.  I. was. wiped!)  She also wanted to sleep not with jie jie but ME our first night here in Beijing.  I drifted off to sleep smelling the clean scent of coconut shampoo in her hair and listening to her deep breathing.

We still have a way to go, by day she seems to want me only about 50% of the time.  But there is a lifetime ahead of us to learn the dance of our relationship.

The difference is that now I have hope of what it is going to look like...


(getting ready now to head to the airport...north carolina ~via detroit~ here we come!  we'll see ya in about 24 hours!)

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's been most enjoyable to be in China with you and your family and enjoy all their journeys, I'm kind of sad that you'll soon be home. I'l glad that Natali is warming up to you. Keep the stories coming, I love them.
Marge

Traci said...

Oh this makes me so happy! So happy for you and her!!! Can't wait to see you!

Shannon said...

Yippie! Can't wait to see all 7 of you! Praying for uneventful travels! See you TONIGHT!

Kelleyn Rothaermel said...

So happy for you!

Heather said...

Loved reading this ... so happy for you both! Safe travels my friend.

Laurie said...

SO happy to hear that things have turned around... just in time to come HOME and learn how wonderful THAT place is!! :) Welcome home! :)

Heidi Reitz said...

Hooray for each and every step. The way you wrote this story was beautiful. Another treasure for all time.

UGAMom8689 said...

Thank you for sharing your travels and allowing me to watch our great Lord at work. I have prayed for safe travels for your family and that your newest daughter would open her heart to you sooner rather than later. So glad to hear that you will be on U.S. soil soon and your family will be safe and sound in your own home. May God Bless you always.

Heather said...

Oh that is such a good feeling when you see the glimmer of light (and also when you finally don't flinch when they walk towards you. Lol). My bite marks were my "battle wounds" that hurt my heart so much worse. Your a wise momma! So cool to see her coming around and feeling comfortable.

Janet and Kevin said...

So happy to see your Natalie coming around. We read about the rejection of one parent, we talk about it before hand, and we know in our head that it is perfectly normal, but it still hurts our hearts so deeply. Our youngest was like that as well. Rejoicing that you are starting to see her heart turning to you.

Praying you safely home. Looking forward to seeing your posts from home as you all work your way through transition time.

janet and gang

Glenda said...

I never worried, dear friend! You are a wonderful Mommy and it couldn't take long before your youngest realized this and becomes one of your biggest fans!