happy birthday baby

Oh Natalie.

Today the sun shone and the color of the sky was a true Carolina blue, so your daddy, sisters, brothers and I went to a spot on the greenway to enjoy God's creation.  After a three mile walk/scooter ride, we stopped for a picnic style snack.

The leaves are just beginning to turn colors and the temperature was delightful.  As we walked along the river, the reflections of the leaves were simply stunning.  Each of us, even little Daniel, marveled in the beauty of the day.

It was a perfect afternoon..well, .almost perfect.

But one thing was missing today sweet girl.

You.  Our birthday girl.

While every day of the wait is tough, birthdays are especially hard.  Today all I wanted to do was hold you tight in my arms and hug you.  To wish you a happy birthday and to take pictures of you blowing out a candle on your favorite kind of cupcake.  To celebrate you as the princess you are.

Instead I had to settle for wrapping up our home study history forms (it was a victory though, 1.6 pounds of paperwork are ready to go and we should be assigned a caseworker soon) and dreaming of you.

We missed you today little one.  All of us wished you were here and spent time discussing what we'd tell you today if we could have talked with you.  We made you cards this evening and went to a "fancy" Chinese restaurant to celebrate you.  Your siblings had to comment that while we asked for a table for six, we were seated at a table with one extra chair.  At that moment we declared that we'd come back next year ~ with you ~ to celebrate your fourth birthday and fill in that empty chair.

By the way, at the sight of that empty chair, both your oldest sister and I may shed a few tears over the fact that you weren't home to be celebrated on your third birthday.

One comfort though.  Next year you will be here.  And you'll never celebrate another birthday without your forever family again.

We love you Natalie Z.  Happy birthday baby girl!