Another standstill

We're at another standstill in the "paperwork pregnancy" for Darcy and today I'm not in a very happy place. (Consider it a warning if you want to have fuzzy warm thoughts for the weekend ~ you're not going to find them here today...)

So last week I was pretty much on cloud nine because our sweet social worker stayed up late to complete our home study the night after our last interview. While it had taken slightly over two months from signing our agreement with the agency until we were finally allowed to start our visits, our super social worker crammed all our visits into a 10 day period and had the report completed the very next. And that day the long awaited background check for Ian came back and it felt like we were finally making up for lost time.

I was notified that our social worker with our home study agency passed our report on to our social worker with our adoption agency for review (apparently Hague guidelines have made this a much longer process). That was first thing last Thursday morning. And then today ~ a full week later, even taking into consideration the holiday last Friday ~ our agency social worker passed along the information that our home study agency has yet to send her the supporting documentation that she needs in order to review our report.

To say that I am disheartened is an understatement! I'm also frustrated at our home study agency's lack of a sense of urgency. Don't they understand that while Darcy is happy with her foster family that what is best for her in the long run is to become united with her forever family as soon as possible? Don't they realize that each day (and now full week) of delay in getting our home study reviewed costs us undetermined time in getting our application in to the USCIS? Don't they know how much I had hoped to have our USCIS application on it's way to the Chicago lock box BEFORE we depart for Yellowstone next week? Don't they realize that as each week passes that the likely hood of us getting to Darcy this calendar year becomes less and less a reality?

I've shed tears this afternoon over the delay. I just want to get her home so that she can start to know the love of a forever mommy, daddy, brother and sister. I want her to feel the all encompassing love of her Heavenly Father! I want her to be able to begin to get the medical treatment that will benefit her more the younger she can start it. And quite honestly, I just want to hold that sweet baby.

And yet I still have a peace. I have complete trust in God that there is a reason that my season as a mother of two precious ones is to last a bit longer. But I'm gonna be honest, it hurts a little...

I'm simply thankful beyond words that I can express that I have my two smile makers to bring me out of my funk!