Before Kylie came home, I read books. I read BabyWise, Dr. Spock, Adoption Parenting, Bonding and Attachment, What to Expect: the First Year, AND What to Expect: the Toddler Years. I talked to friends and got more unsolicited advice than I wanted. From all that, I KNEW that I should never hold my baby until she fell asleep. Books and people told me that I'd start something that I didn't want to. I knew what I was "supposed to do", but I simply couldn't put my frightened baby down in a crib when she cried. Wanting to be a mommy for over five years before I held my daughter got to me. I had the mindset that "if I want to rock my baby to sleep until she's five then I'll just do it!" Sure enough, before you knew it, Kylie needed for one of us to be at least holding her hand in order to fall asleep. And so the story has gone since February of 2007...
...until Thursday night of this past week. After several unsuccessful attempts to leave her room while she was still awake, it finally occurred to me that she may be frightened of the dark. (DUH Mommy!) So I offered her a flashlight and all was good. Now as Ian and I talked, ate ice cream, and half-way watched TV we'd sneak back to peek in her room. She was quietly playing with some of her dolls, until we got ready to go to bed and caught this precious moment.
So sweet! And now we've gone out and bought a new nightlight (her super cute one is still at our old house because it is still furnished in hopes of attracting a buyer!) that is light sensitive. Now she just holds the flashlight (it's off) and plays quietly by the soft glow of an LED nightlight. After a while we'll work on getting into bed more quickly, but for now we're enjoying having some time with just the two of us in the evenings again!
12.15.2008
Just a flashlight? Who knew?
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10 comments:
What an amazing realization! And, I did buy that toddler book - I think I will not read it before I go and try to learn as I go for the first time! I LOVE your pictures of the kids sleeping, I think they are some of my favorite!
Can I get an AMEN? That is GREAT news! You are such a good momma! You were there when Kylie needed you, and that's all that matters. I am happy, though, for you and Ian. It is so much easier when you can just put them to bed and leave the room.
Love ya, girlie!
So sweet :) AnnaClaire has those same jammies... they are my favorites! And the same bunny, too, which she can't go a night without!
It's amazing something so simple worked. That's great for you all! And what a sweet picture!!
Amen! They are only young once, hold them while they'll let you. I did the same thing (rock my kids until they fell asleep). Still rock Sam. We had to move out of the room a little each night for Alex to get over it, BUT it's well worth it. Do they have those pjs in adult sizes?
Stephanie Y
This is good news for all of you. Kylie will no longer fear the dark and you and Ian will have more time together in the evenings. Seems like such a 'breakthrough' when you can get into their minds and realize what a problem is all about and then solve it. Who would have thought that such a simple solution would calm her enough to be alone in her room and enjoy playing with her dolls for awhile before going to sleep? Definitely a "win" "win" situation.
Love, LaoLao
SO glad she is going to sleep on her own, I know how tiring that can be although what we are willing to do. I too read Baby Wise and followed it well with my three bio kids BUT, Hudson was a whole different story. My heart would just break as he cried such a fearful cry and I would think about what the 2 1/2 years of being "alone" had been like for him. You were right in giving it time.
I was just going to comment that little Kylie looks just like AC going night night. The pj's and bunny are exactly the same! No flashlight here, though. But I see Emily already beat me to share that news!
Way to go Kristi, with the flashlight idea! You are one awesome mama!
Pam
Precious!
Aunt cici
Does Kylie refuse to use blankets?? Malia does and so we have to put layers on her. Love those jammies!
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