Pages

10.28.2008

Baby steps in father/son bonding

So much has happened today! The most significant is that Caleb officially became our son ~ October 28, 2008 is our adoption day! But I get ahead of myself...

So in the previous post, you could see where Caleb started the night. But at about 4 am I hear a whispered, "Hey Mommy?" Being the devoted mother I am, I answered, "Kylie, the sun is still ni-night, it is time to sleep." And I hear back, "Mommy... where Ta-eb?" That's all it takes to make my feet hit the floor! I switched on the bathroom light and then could see where he was. As soon as I got Kylie back to sleep (which only lasted until about 5 when I heard a whispered, "Mommy, my beddy hungy!" ~ peanut butter bagel by bathroom light again this morning...) I took a picture. Man, this kid moves around!
I was afraid that waking up would bring a round of crying like yesterday afternoon following nap time, but this is what I got instead!
Maybe I ~ Ms. Non Morning Person ~ can take some lessons from my smiling son about mornings! Anyway, after the kids were awake, it was time to get them ready for breakfast. While I was getting Kylie's toothbrush, Ian offered Caleb some Teddy Grahams and his Mickey Mouse phone and we had our first positive steps between the two of them. (I'm still somewhat scarred by last night in the Mr. Xie Restaurant ~ I'm not sure I gave a complete account of how bad our exit was! When I said Caleb wailed, I didn't include that he locked his legs in the high chair and so as Ian tried to get him out, the chair was banging around as he screamed. Cue my over tired baby girl to join in the chorus and I could have just fallen into the floor!)
Hello? We finally got both kids dressed (I fear we may never be on time for anything again...) and headed out for breakfast. Look who was holding Daddy's hand on the way to the elevator!

Following a delicious buffet meal ~ I think that the buffet here is even better than the China Hotel in Guangzhou ~ we went back to the civil affairs office to make Caleb's adoption final. We were surprised with a visit from Director Lu (who is highly respected by parents on the Xian'An City SWI yahoo group) and got to talk to him some about Caleb. He commented several times on what a clever boy Caleb is and that we were lucky to have him join our family. Director Lu kindly honored my request for him to write Caleb a personal note in the beautiful journal Traci gave me and then actually asked us if we would take a picture with him.













Our interview with the civil affairs worker was much more thorough than the one with Kylie. She wanted to know why we wanted two children and asked us "your plan for him." Kinda vague if you ask me, but we must have answered in a satisfactory fashion, because she completed the proceedings. Caleb is officially our son!

Both kids fell asleep in the van on the way back, so we headed up to our room for nap time. From there we wondered over to the RT Mart center to find some lunch. We ended up at Pizza Hut and Caleb ate as much pizza for lunch as I did. (What an amazing appetite!) Then Zoey came to our hotel to meet us. We headed to the riverside park (along the Yangtze) which was about a three mile walk. The weather was beautiful today, so the exercise getting there felt quite good. I also enjoyed that we got to see so much by foot. You really do get a much better feel for an area by walking rather than using motorized transportation.

Thankfully Kylie decided to walk with Zoey.

Chillin at the park.

It was an opportunity for the kids to check out the fish relief carvings and also to burn off some steam.

I did see Kylie trying to show Caleb the "Runners start" position.

The riverside was quite beautiful and there were many brides there getting portraits taken. None of us were dressed that formally, but it felt like getting a family photo in front of the Yangzte River was the right thing to do!
When we got back the kids played with some playdough and Caleb fed Kylie half a box of raisins. Their interaction is so cute right now!
Kylie pretty much drawfs Caleb! After dinner it was time for bath and then to hop in the bed. Look who finally let Ian hold him for the first time! I was brief, but it is a positive step ~ there were no tears!

Baba and baby boy





25 comments:

Melissa Wagner said...

Hi Kristi and Ian! Julia is going to be so excited to see new pictures of Baba Lu! We have video of Julia and him together prior to her adoption and she loves to watch it and still talks about him. What a great experience for you guys and Caleb to have gotten to meet him. :-)

Hugs!
Melissa

Mom of Triple As said...

Those pictures are pricess. I'm so happy that Caleb is warming up to Ian! I showed some of the pictures to the kids last night and they were very excited.
Much love,
Tricia

Anonymous said...

Ian & Kristi,

Praise God for small miracles that will become huge. I wish you could have seen your mom's face at bible study last night. I have not seen her beaming that much in a while. She is almost dancing.

Love all of you,
Cheryl

Anonymous said...

It's official, he's yours! What a blessing that Caleb and Kylie are interacting so well. Language just doesn't seem to be a factor - love is winning. Thanks for all of the pictures and commentary. Makes me almost feel like I am there.
God be with you, LaoLao

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing your journey with us. We can't get enough of Caleb's beautiful face at our house & it's always a blessing to see Kylie & the rest of the crew. We are so grateful that the prayers for Caleb to warm up to his amazing Baba are being answered. Now the "official papers" are finally catching up what has always been in your hearts.

God Bless,
Jenny & Olivia

Jordan Carl said...

These pictures are wonderful! I am so happy that Caleb is doing better with Ian I'm sure that can be a frustration. I am praying for you all, hope you have a great rest of your visit and be sure to introduce Caleb to my face sometime ; )

Lots of love all around,

Jordan

Our Journey said...

What an awesome day!! So many great things all at the same time! How neat that the director was able to write a note to Caleb - that means so much I'm sure. I'm just so excited to get up to read your blog & all your adventures every day!!

bbeatley said...

How awesome! God is awesome! Seeing the difference only one day makes, is amazing. Thank you for sharing your journey again and i pray that Ian and Caleb continue to bond. It amazes me how easy kids can handle changes in their life...I think we can all learn a big lesson from both of your kids. God bless you and your family throughout the rest of your journey in China.

Donna said...

Love the pictures!! What a smile to wake up to!!!
So glad to see Caleb warming up to Ian - we're praying that Caleb's heart will know what a great set of parents he has!!!
Hugs!

Anonymous said...

What a priceless picture of His smile and laughter on only the second day of a huge transition in his little life...a true testament to the goodness of God!!!and a true testament to him having a family where he already KNOWS he is loved and adored!!! So glad to hear the bonding is beginning with Caleb and Ian. Wow , we can't wait to see you ALL!!
Shannon

Anonymous said...

We are so happy for the four of you! Congratulations on being the parents of two beautiful children! We can't wait to see Caleb in person in November. God certainly has answered prayer; many children have a tough time bonding with one parent & it seems that Caleb is well on his way to having a strong bond with Ian! We'll keep praying for a smooth trip; enjoy your "honeymoon" as a family of four!

MelLynn said...

yay! i am so excited to see the growing between all of you guys!

cheryl said...

Wow! What a precious little boy! I am so excited for you all! It is so fun and encouraging to see those "baby steps" that you are sharing. What a blessing to follow your journey...thank you for sharing. I am praying for you all.
Blessings,
Cheryl (awaa friend)

Anonymous said...

That picture of Caleb in the morning is awesome. I can only imagine me looking @ you like that in the morning in our Elon days. I have a feeling you will soon be a morning person. With a start like that to a day, who wouldn't feel great? Glad things are going better w/Ian. Your family looks like they are having a great time. Can't wait to see you all!!

Beth

Melissa said...

Kristi -

Your story is just priceless and I am so thrilled with that last picture of Ian holding Caleb - his smile says is all! May Kylie and Caleb to bond as they are and I hope you enjoy the rest of your trip!

Melissa

Cindy M said...

Um, no, you will never be on time again...things about us making a lot more sense now??? :-)

Caleb looks like he's always been with you! Kylie seems to be doing awesome, as well, with the transition. And THANK YOU for the mental picture of the restaurant debacle...I apologetically had a good chuckle at your expense. I mean, the clinging to the high chair thing...trust me, you will laugh someday!

Great picture of his smile this morning! Great picture of Ian with his boy!

Love you guys!

Allison said...

Wow--I cannot believe how similar Kylie and Caleb look. Looks like a great day for all of you!

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh!!! When I read Kylie asked where Caleb was in the middle of the night my heart sunk. I can't imagine how you felt! But how precious that Kylie was worried about him!
That picture of him grinning when he woke up is priceless!!! I love it! It made me smile all over!
I am so glad he and Ian are starting to have a few bonding moments. We have certainly been praying that they would asap!
Thanks for posting, I have been checking every couple of hours today! I just love seeing how things are going. We think of you all OFTEN!!!
Love ya
Aunt Cici and Uncle Adam

Anonymous said...

Your Mom helped me how to "comment". Yeh. Carolyn, Lynn and I decided little Caleb was afraid of Ian's round blue eyes and blond hair not just that he is a man. He's probably not seen too many "light" people.

He seems to be adjusting to "yall".
It's so cute to see him sleeping w/Kylie. Congrats!!! Aunt Dee Dee

NaiNai Miller said...

I am just devouring the pictures - I can't stop looking at them and reading the narrative. I got so scared when I read that Kylie didn't know where Caleb was, although I guessed that he was at the bottom of the bed - little monkey!! I am so grateful that Caleb's bonding with Ian has started. I know how much Ian wants to hold his son. I'm glad you are getting to experience China first-had by walking the neighborhood. And I think it is awesome that the director wrote in Caleb's journal - what a treasure for Caleb to read as he grows up. Please give the kids hugs and kisses from their 'dahma muir'. I miss all of you.
Love nainai

Anonymous said...

It looks like you're doing so well! Caleb looks so happy...I LOVE that picture of him smiling! And, I'm so glad he's warming up to Ian (who can't help but love Ian?!?). We're praying for you--enjoy your time together...

Love,
Rebecca & Sarah

Brayley said...

That smile is INCREDIBLE! God has certainly blessed you with two beautiful children! I know it must be hard to steal away and blog, but Chris and I so enjoy following along with you on this journey! As soon as I hit the door today, the first words from him were, "There's a new post!" We can't wait till you're stateside and we get to visit together!
Love, Jen

Nancy said...

YAY YAY YAY!! Love the photo of Ian & Caleb holding hands. Ian looks so happy!

LOVE LOVE LOVE the photo of Caleb right after he woke up.

Wow, what a family, such blessings!

Heather said...

Love to hear things are going well but I did have to laugh at the high chair scene, ha! Just so you know the rule with our extended family is 5 extra minutes per child before we are counted as "late". With two children you may want to consider it too, ha! Have a great day and we will see you soon.

Heather

Anonymous said...

I've been praying for you and was so excited to see your beautiful boy! Can't wait to meet him in person. What a wonderful gift God has brought to your family!
Glenda